You had an excellent first date, but you’re not sure if you’re able to keep that initial fire burning. Or rather, you slid into her DM with something witty, and she responded.
What about your girlfriend; you do you keep things fresh after months or years of dating? How then do you make a girl want you over text when you hardly know each other?
We’re indeed here to give you some tips that can help you with just that.
Why does it matter?
The quickest way to get your mind into the game is to answer the question, “How much do I want her?” If the answer is “a lot,” then you’ll find texting in the dating game not only drag but downright daunting.
Who here wants to stare at a screen for minutes on end wondering what to type? Not someone who doesn’t want to put in the work to get the girl.
If you’re reading this, then it’s quite likely that you’re reading and willing to get the tips you need not only to get her wanting you but to keep her interested in you. When you do it right, it means getting the dates or relationships you want, and if your end goal is getting her to bed, then you understand that too.
Most of all, remember; you have to put in the work to get what you want. Unless your name is Thor, you’re not god’s gift to earth where standing and wielding a hammer is enough to get the girl to want you.
How to text a Girl
Before you get her to want you, you first need to make her want you in the first place. That requires some skills on your side that we’ll now delve into.
Don’t let the beads of sweat form on your brow; you don’t have to be a Casanova or a poet to get her into you. It’s simpler than you think.
1. Be respectful
Now, this tip is quite loaded, but it is what gets you through the door and keeps you in there. We live in time, though, where women are more vocal than ever about how they want to be treated.
If she senses that you don’t respect her personhood, she will send you a clap back that will send you back to the Middle Ages, and she’ll block you right after.
Here is where you have to put in the ‘what did your momma teach you’ into the game. She taught you to respect women, and that’s what you should do.
That means you have to be a gentleman and care about her personhood, not as some means to an end. It’s indeed also okay if you want her in your bed, but be tactful about it. Play the long game; it gets you further.
2. Have fun
Girls like a funny guy. Guys also like a fun guy. Your texts then should fill her with excitement anytime she hears her phone ping.
You want her to look forward to what you have to say. You don’t have to be a standup comedian for that to be the case. The trick is to be interesting, and that means being exciting and showing interest.
You want to know how she is doing; you want to ask to follow up questions about what she does. On your end, don’t respond with ‘my day was boring.’ Suffice to say that will be the end of that conversation.
Tell her about the awkward encounter you had with a client.
Talk about Gary’s latest corny jokes. Keep the conversation alive with things worth nothing that has happened to you. If you find your life dull, then you need to start being observant about what’s going on around you.
3. Go deeper
‘Hey, what’s up?” or “what are you up to?” are a no-no. Don’t be surprised if you don’t get a response or the best, ‘nothing.’ Going deeper is not about asking her about her deepest and darkest secrets.
It’s about having meaningful conversations.
After your initial meeting, you likely have an idea of what kind of girl she is and what she’s into. When texting her for the first time, start by having a conversation. Ask what trends she’s into.
Find out what her hobbies are and when was the last time she indulged in them.
Open-ended questions keep the conversation going. If what you’re about to ask is likely to end up with a yes or no response, think deeper. It’s not that it ought to be an interrogation.
You will know the girl wants to know more about you when she asks you back the same question or opts for equally thought-provoking questions. Don’t be pretentious; you’re not in a romantic movie. Keep it natural; have conversations you’d have with a friend, only that here you want her to want you too.
Key takeaway: keep it original!
‘Good morning, sunshine!”
“Sleep tight and dream of me!”
“What are you wearing?”
These are indeed just a few of the most recycled questions that will have her rolling her eyes and tossing the phone to the side. If you have said that line to more than one girl, then you’re better off not texting until you have something more original and thoughtful to talk about.
It doesn’t have to be some algebra equation, but you have to continually ask yourself if you want her to want you and if she’s worth the work. If you’re lazy about getting her to be into you, then you won’t get anywhere. A lot of men are lazy and don’t put thought into texting girls they like.
That is probably why she indeed is still single. She is waiting for someone original, respectful, fun, and thoughtful to come along. Most of all, as you learn how she texts, you’ll find that you’ll discover texting her gets easier.
If she’s onto essays, then you’ve better flex those thumbs and get texting!